Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Some things you just shouldn't do....

Happy Halloween Dearies!

I just got the crotchfruitians in bed. What a long day/night! We spent 2 hours between trick or treating and stopping at Burger Hell for ice cream. 

Chatty had sent me a picture earlier of a coworker dressed as Cleopatra, so I had to stop in a see him. I snapped pictures of everyone up there while the kids ate ice cream.

I spent all day in the kitchen making cookies for Midget's "Fall" party. I think I'm going to give up and make cupcakes. I'm still not even half way done and I only have til Friday....sigh

It's my own fault. I do this to myself every time. It has to do with my  obsessive compulsive disorder. If 1 is good, then of course 4 would be better. Thank goodness for Chief . He always supports me no matter what kind of mess I make.

All of this while cute and sappy has nothing to do with my blog title....

The Crotchfruitians and I went out tonight for trick or treating, so of course we stopped by to see the Parental Figures. I had texted the Boy to see if he has a long sleeved shirt for Midget. She was freezing because she can't listen to me and wore a short sleeved shirt under her costume.

The Boy handed me a shirt and I took Midget into the bathroom to get it on her. Bird went in the living room to show his grandma his costume. He was Ghostrider tonight and soooo proud of his costume.

Now we're getting into the part that has to deal with the blog title....

There are some things you just don't do....

I have never told my children they are anything but perfect. I never call them stupid. I never tell Bird he is too skinny. I never tell Midget she's gaining weight. (which she is). I never tell them they are anything but beautiful and amazing. (they are)

While in the bathroom I hear my mother tell Bird "You're ugly". Poor Midget, I was stooped down in her face when I yelled "Mom"

How fucking dare you tell my child he's ugly? He's not! He's beautiful and he's perfect and he's MINE! I was so pissed! About 10 years ago I would have walked in there and knocked her on her ass.

Growing up I was told I was stupid. I was fat. (I was and still am) Now I'm told I'm fat. My teeth are nasty. I'm lazy....the insults go on and on. 

How the hell does she get I'm lazy? I work a full time job, come home, clean, do laundry, cook dinner, I go to EVERY school function for 4 kids. (As long as I'm not at work) But I'm fucking lazy?

Yes I'm fat. So what? You're not a size 4 anymore and you haven't been for 30 years! I've accepted what I look like. And Chief loves me for who I am. All you do is sit on your ass all day watching tv of fucking off on the computer. 

I was so angry I couldn't get Midget's costume on right. It took me 3 tries. I got her redressed hugged the Boy and left fuming. 

I don't understand her reasoning. 

You were mentally abusive to me, Froggy, and Tattoo all our lives....YOU WILL NOT FUCK WITH MY KIDS' SELF IMAGES!

Monday, October 15, 2012

Blame it on the Root Beer....

Hello Dearies....

I had something I wanted to share with you. I was reading a blog I follow when I saw a story that is very much like the things that happen in our house. Please follow the link. I think you'll love the story.

Friday, October 12, 2012

Update on the birthday party....

Good evening Dearies....

If you read my last blog then you know (if not quick run back and read it here) that today was the Boy's 18th birthday. I just got back from his party and ate dinner (nomnomnom) with the crotch fruit.

I had a problem with the party planning. Where to have it? The Hut is too small for any kind of party. The Parental figures and MiL both would have let me have it at their respective houses. But there was a problem there. The Parental figures can't get up MiL's driveway. MiL can't get down the steps at the Parental figures' house. And none of them can get up the steps to the Hut. So....what to do? I talked to Bosslady and she said it was ok for me to have the party at Burger Hell in the conference room. Sweet! So that's what I did.

I've been planning this party for weeks. Honestly it's been months. You only turn 18 once so I had to do this big. Not big as in bunches of people. But still big. For his cakes (yes cakes there were 3) I made 2 ice cream cakes and a candy bar cake.

For his gift from us, I blew up 100 water balloons (no water) and rolled up a dollar bill and shoved it in each balloon. I had Squealer help me carry the box in. We made a big show on how heavy it was. I wouldn't let him touch it until it was time to open presents. MiL bought him 3 awesome shirts this morning. All 3 I had the boy pick out yesterday. (No he didn't know why he was looking at shirts) 

The look on his face when he opened that box was priceless! I snapped a bunch of pictures but, Chief has my camera right now.

While we were eating cake, his biggest present arrived. I had called 2 of his best friends that he hasn't seen in 3 years and had them come out. I almost cried over the look on his face when he saw them! Even I had missed these 2. LeLe has been mine since they were in 3rd grade. Richboy, LeLe and the Boy were inseparable in school. 

Squealer had to march at the Homecoming  game tonight. MiL took Chief to see the game. I wish I could have gone. 

Chief left and forgot he had all my stuff in his pockets. I was left at Burger Hell with no wallet, no cigarettes, and no keys to get back in the Hut!

After all the adults left, we decided to get the money out of the balloons. The Boy and I stepped in the box and popped a few. Then the Boy thought sitting in the box was a good idea. Well, until he had Richboy push him around the room. Most of the balloons popped when the side of the box split. While the 3 friends caught up some more, Chatty and I unrolled the money.

Thank goodness for Chatty or the crotch fruit and I would still be sitting at Burger Hell. Chatty and the Boy took my phone and went and got the keys from Chief. 

When they got back, I hugged the Boy and asked if he had a good time. He told me it was the best birthday ever. Awwwwww

So now the crotch fruit and I are home. Dinner has been eaten and they are playing in their rooms. 

Chief just walked in from the game. I'm going to go fix him some dinner and demand nuggles!


The best present ever....

Good morning Dearies....

Today is the day! On this day 18 years ago I given my best friend. I was given the Boy. It kills me to think my baby is now a man.

It seems like yesterday there was an annoying little shit following me asking questions. "What's that mommy? What does that do mommy? Why is he doing that mommy".... on and on that kid asked questions. He wanted to know everything about everything!

I know I screwed up over and over raising the Boy. I did my best. I was a very young mom (kid) trying to raise a child on my own. Yes Deadbeat was there and later Fatass was there. But being there is not the same as trying to raise this crazy little crotch fruit. 

With the "men" in his life being total assholes, and a mother who never had a real mother for a role model, this kid turned out great. Better then great....he is amazing! The Boy is such a gentleman. He has a girlfriend now. Chatty isn't sure what to do with him. He opens and holds doors for her, he insists on paying when they go out, he says please and thank you, Yes Ma'am, no Ma'am....the list goes on and on. 

No matter how many times I screwed up the Boy still loved me. When I was having problems and going off for no apparent reason, all the times I screamed and yelled, all the times I dropped the ball, the Boy still loved me. I leaned on the Boy for many things. He helped me raise Bird and Midget. He was more of a father to them then the men in their lives.

I've tried to be the mom and dad. I always go overboard. I try to make up for all the things he missed out on growing up. I know I failed many times. The kid should hate me. (I would) 

But through it all he is my best friend, he is my baby boy....