This post will be the hardest post I've ever had to make. I lost so much in the past 2 days my head is spinning.
I lost the love of my life, my best friend, the one person that "got" me. Today I lost Mace (formerly known as Chief).
I tell you a lot, but I never spill everything. And I haven't told you about what's been really going on. And I'm not going to right now.
Last night I asked Mace to leave. Today he called his mother and left with his medicine, computer and a tote of his clothes.
I've spent the better part of the day trying to keep busy and keep my mind off of things. But after only getting 2-3 hours of sleep last night and the mad dash cleaning I did today I'm worn out.
I'm tired and and I'm scared.
I'm scared of being alone. I've never spent the night alone in this apartment.
I'm scared of laying down in that big empty bed.
I'm scared I'm going to start crying again.
And most of all....I'm scared I lost the love of my life forever.